Separation crisis: how to support a child during the period of searching for their own "I"

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Sometimes parents notice that their child suddenly begins to act "contrary" or show inexplicable outbursts of anger. These changes may indicate a so-called separation crisis - an important stage when a child learns independence and begins to search for his own identity. And outbursts of anger or rage are a protective mechanism of his own boundaries.

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🤔What does this process mean?

At the stages of growing up, a child naturally seeks to "separate" and explore the world without the constant care of his parents. This is not rebellion, but the need to gain more freedom and try to affirm his beliefs, test them for viability, and make decisions about his actions independently. However, of course, not without the fact that sometimes without much understanding of the consequences and responsibility for these consequences. That's why we, parents, so often try to insist on our own way, and this is precisely why a separation crisis can arise in parents.

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The carousel tells about important signals that can help parents understand the needs of their child🖇️

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🫂How to support a child during this period?

Perceiving a separation crisis as a natural development helps parents to respond with understanding to the child's new emotions. Try to expand the boundaries of what is permitted by allowing the child to choose in certain matters what is important to them. For example, instead of demanding to clean the room immediately, give the opportunity to do it at a convenient time for them.

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It is important to remember that the best way for parents to get through a separation crisis is to show the child that they are accepted in any way. The feeling of unconditional support and love helps the child not to be afraid to make mistakes and be themselves. When they know that they are valued in both victories and failures, resistance and protest decrease, because there is no need to defend their boundaries aggressively. This approach not only builds trust, but also lays the foundation for a strong relationship between parent and child that will last even into adulthood.